Tacit Exposure

Do I Have A Reason?

If something is a good idea, you need a reason not to do more of it.

If something is a bad idea, you need a reason not to do less of it.

I like ruminating on these two phrases. They make sense at face value: of course if something is good you probably want to do more of it, and if something is bad you probably want to do less of it. I've spent a lot of time over the past year or two trying to identify what is good/bad in my life and turn the dials accordingly.

For example, fitness has been a relatively new addition into my life. It's been fun and had positives so I've increased the frequency over time. Now I'm at a certain point where I need to incorporate rest into my exercise habits which is precisely a reason not to do more of it.

Reducing social media has improved my mental well being too. It was bad for me, why not use it less?

But I don't follow this advice. That's pretty human, of course, but it still sorta aches. I like being sociable, engaging in small talk especially with strangers, but I don't do it much. Why? Do I have a reason not to do more of it?

Talking to people is scary despite the vast majority of interactions being positive. My reasons to not do it more are driven by a fear, not reason. What if this? What if that? I'm nervous. They probably don't want to be bothered. Etc. These are reasons, but not reasons that satisfy me.

I put off going cold-turkey on social media feeds because I wanted to "stay informed." I needed to keep up with friends. I needed to have accounts to follows bands and know about live shows. I needed to know about the news and what was going on around me. These were valid-feeling reasons but they also didn't feel complete. They didn't feel honest. I knew doomscrolling was not being informed. I knew I could keep up with friends elsewhere. But it took 2 or 3 years before I accepted that, no, there was no good reason not to do less of the bad thing.1

I'm still not at 0 social media. You don't need to immediately cut out all of something. Just like you don't need to dive head-first into the good thing and make it the new center of your life. It's just something to think about.

Is this bad for me?
Do I have a reason not to do it less?

Is this good for me?
Do I have a reason not to do it more?

  1. I think that's a quadruple negative? Oops.

#journal